My husband and I were blessed to cross paths with Shelley and her husband several years ago. Her quiet confidence, poise, and faith have always been something I’ve admired about her. Today, we talk about instilling biblical truths, feeling loved and heard, the journey of balancing a career and Motherhood, and more. Shelley, thank you for allowing us a glimpse into your life in words.
How many children do you have? 2
How old is your child? 3 years old and 5 months.
Are you a mom of boys, girls, or both? Boys.
How are you still growing as a mom?
If you really want to get to know yourself, the lovely and the ugly, motherhood will do it. Patience is one of the most important attributes to have as a parent, and being a mom has shown me that I am not as patient as I thought I was!
With God’s help, I am continually learning how to have more patience with both myself and my children. This includes granting more grace to myself in the moments I feel like a failure, or giving myself praise when I have a victory. Praying God gives me patience in the process!
How do you combat worldly influence on your children?
My husband and I always say that we are our children’s protectors. It is our responsibility as parents to guide and shield them from things that aren’t spiritually, physically or mentally nourishing.
Our best practice is keeping a constant watch on everything that they are exposed to, and taking moments to explain if they saw or heard something that we feel (or they feel) is not in line with that.
We let them watch only movies or shows that we have seen the content fully. There was one time recently that our older son was watching an ‘approved’ show on YouTube kids and a commercial that was not appropriate for his age came on. We heard him say “Mommy and Daddy, I don’t like this”. We told him that if he ever sees or hears things that don’t make his heart feel happy inside, to let us know right away.
Our goal is to shield and to teach, so that they can grow in spiritual discernment.
What makes you feel loved and heard?
Acknowledgement in words and time alone. We juggle so many things as parents; our homes, jobs, daily tasks, children, etc., and it becomes so easy to overlook our spouses and all that they do.
I feel the most valued when I am given a verbal thanks for all the many things (even the unexciting things…. like laundry, bringing the dog to the vet, vacuuming) that I do.
I am introverted, so having small times of solidarity are cherished moments for me to rest, recharge, and regain momentum.
How did you / do you pursue a full-time career and still devote yourself to Mothering?
I have realized that it is OK to not go along with expectations that others may have for me or even that I somehow created for myself.
When I was on maternity leave for my first son, I felt that I wanted to have more time with him beyond just the weeknights and evenings. You know what I did? I asked my boss if I could work a reduced full-time schedule and she agreed!
It sounds so simple, but I shamed myself feeling like I had to do the standard Monday-Friday schedule.
How do you instill biblical truths in your kids?
We show our sons how exciting it is to go to church and to learn about Jesus. We sing Christian songs and read books together at night. One day he even broke out into the song ‘Way Maker’ out of the blue. We did not even know he knew the words. Amazing.
We also teach him about spiritual warfare and how to pray using simple terms that he can understand.
I am all the more grateful for the women (like Shelley) who have chosen to join me on this journey of transparency and support – ESPECIALLY in addition to the life adjustments and loads we are all experiencing in the midst of COVID-19! I can’t thank you enough.
Connection and support are vital to our growth and survival as humans and as Women. I have met many Mothers (myself included at one point) who are going through the trenches and carrying loads solo. This has often led to depression, loneliness, isolation, and such guilt and shame in “not measuring up”.
My prayer is that the women who lay eyes on “Our Lives in Words“, will be encouraged, enlightened, and all the more hopeful.
For the Moms,
This series is for the Moms! In honor of Mothers, this May will be chock-full of real stories of Motherhood from Moms of all ages, in all stages. Join me as I feature different Moms (on a weekly basis) who will so graciously be sharing their life in words.
If you missed yesterday’s feature, catch it here! Stay tuned for more stories of triumph, valleys, and faith.