- How many children do you have? I am a thirty-one-year-old mother of two awesome little boys.
- How old are your child(ren) OR how long have you been a mom? My oldest recently turned seven
years old and my youngest is one, he’ll be two on the fourth of July (I know what you’re
thinking… yes, he is a little firecracker lol).
How does having this treasure of Christ influence and transform your approach and ability to mother?
Having the treasure of Christ has influenced and transformed my approach and ability to be a mother my sons in so many ways.
I have gained a true understanding of what it is to truly love another person unconditionally and I have been able to pour on and shower my sons with a love that has no strings attached. I will forever love my sons in any circumstance, good or bad. I know that it is only through the realization of Christs’ love for us that I am able to mirror it when it comes to loving my children.
Having much more grace has also been a result of having Christ. Romans 2 shows us that God is wonderfully kind, tolerant, and patient with us. Also, Ephesians 2:8, teaches us that grace is a gift from God.
Understanding the grace that God has had for me in my own life has greatly transformed my approach at mothering my sons. In times when I may feel frustrated, I stop and think back on how many times I have freely received grace from God when I deserved his wrath.
I debated using the word “frustrated” while talking about parenting, but the reality is that there are times when we as mothers get overwhelmed and experience feelings of annoyance. It is in this time where we must take a step back and realize just how often God gifts us with his grace then we can, in turn, have a heart filled with grace and love towards our little ones.
I also realize that the relationship I have with my children is much like the relationship I have with The Father (God). There are times when I disobeyed God’s instruction. I have done things that he has told me not to do, as well as not doing the things that he has told me to. Thinking back on my own flaws as a child of God, I can see God’s grace for me. So, when dealing with my children I make sure that I am gracious in my responses to them.
How do you handle the strong-willed child?
Have you ever heard the saying that your children turn out to be exactly like your childhood self? Well, in my case this was completely true. My mother always shares stories of how strong-willed I was as a child. Now that I am a mother of two very strong-willed little boys, I find myself super apologetic to my mother. If I was anything like my boys are, then I know she really had her hands full, lol.
Both of my sons are full of energy and courageous. My oldest is a lot more energized but the young one isn’t following too far behind. Not only would they rather learn things on their own, but they will actually believe that they have a better way of doing so. They not only want to be “in charge” of themselves but of each other as well. My oldest is very opinionated and in most cases, he will let his opinion be known. He definitely got that from me.
When it comes to raising my strong-willed little people, I often have to stop and observe my own behaviors; making sure that I am setting the best example as I can as their mother and as an adult. My older son often expresses how he can’t wait to be an adult so that he doesn’t have to follow rules. I use these moments to sit him down and explain how rules are put in place to help us and not harm us. I make sure that he understands that God has given us a set of rules that are for our good and that we all are commanded to follow them.
Setting clear expectations for my children, as God has set for us, has been essential in my success as a parent. Also, discerning when to be a little more gracious as opposed to when to be more disciplinarian. Spending time in God’s word and setting a time to be in His presence daily has kept me connected to the source. God is the source for everything I need…love, patience, kindness, joy, peace, faithfulness, gentleness, and so much more.
When I am connected to God, parenting my little ones is so much easier because I’m pouring into them from a full supply because God never runs out – rather than on the days when I feel less connected to God and I’m attempting to pour into my children while being empty myself.
How do you equip your children with the gospel?
I believe that our children are our first ministry. Sharing the gospel with my children has been a joy.
My 7-year-old is naturally inquisitive, he asks questions about any and everything. Because of this, sharing the gospel with him has been a breeze. He’s always very enthusiastic during the times we talk about the good news. He can talk and/or ask questions about God for what sometimes can seem like hours, lol, but when it comes to actually sitting and reading the Bible… I sometimes have to offer him an incentive (which is often in the form of a fruit snack or ice cream). Keeping his little mind learning and entertained has been my focus as I teach him of the character, the promises, the commands, and the love of God.
Family devotional time in our household takes place pretty often. Whether it be sitting and reading a few scriptures, learning about a story in the bible, or listening to our favorite worship songs; I have established a habit of praise and worship in our daily lives. Just the other day I overheard my son singing ‘So Will I’, by Osby Berry-a beautiful worship song that describes the love of God. Hearing my 7-year-old child singing praises to God on his own filled me with contentment. I remember thinking to myself, ‘I’m doing a great job in raising my boys to praise, worship, love, and revere God.’
Another day while he and a friend were watching tv, I heard him telling his friend to pray about a toy he wanted that they had seen on a commercial. Overhearing that conversation made me chuckle. It was a joyous chuckle because I realized that my baby not only knows how to petition God on his own but he possesses the faith that God is real and he can provide.
Discovering that my son is sharing God with his friends makes me proud of the boy he’s becoming and hopeful of the man of God he will be.
What do you believe is creating fear for mothers in this present time? How has the Lord quieted fear in your life?
The world is a crazy place, filled with many evils. It has a way of making things that are not of God look “cool” which is enticing not only the youth but people across all age groups. I believe this creates fear for myself and many other mothers.
Although I’m doing my best at teaching them the way of God, it is still very nerve wrecking to think that one day they will leave home and be out in the evil world on their own. They will have to deal with their own temptations and struggles without me. All a mother can really do is hope that you have raised them well enough to follow God’s will for their lives.
When I catch myself fearfully thinking of the future of my boys (or fearfully thinking of anything- for that matter), the Lord brings scriptures to my remembrance that help me in these moments of uncertainty. The scripture 2 Timothy 1:7 states – “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” (KJV). This scripture calms my mind by always reminding me that those feelings of fear are not from The Father. They are a tactic from the enemy to make me weary of defeat and failure.
Another scripture that cancels out my fear is John 16:33 (this is Jesus speaking) – “I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trails and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” (NLT). This verse reassures me that anything that my sons will face out in the big and frightening world has no chance up against God.
God has overcome every obstacle. As their mother I make sure to teach them to go to God with everything, the good and the bad. Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go: And when he is old, he will not depart from it.” (KJV).
I believe God’s word, so I can rest well knowing that I am leading my children on the path to God and when they are older and on their own, they will continue on this path.
Since our inception in 2020, For the Moms has received over 2500 views in over almost 30 countries!
I am all the more grateful for the women (like Mariah) who have chosen to join me on this journey of transparency. I can’t thank you enough.
For the Moms is an annual written blog series which aims to ignite and connect Godly Women in various stages of Motherhood toward the revelation of their Divinely given assignment and their impact as the gatekeepers of the home.
The purpose and mission is to elevate Christ and conceptualize Godly character in Motherhood – and to reach down and pull up those Mothers who are just starting, who are understandably worn, or who have somehow lost their way.
Further, For the Moms is a movement that is calling to attention the warriors within us for the times in which we live. We will aim to unravel the mistakes and cycles of generations past. We will wage war for our families. And, we will diligently seek the Lord’s face concerning His will for our children, and who we are becoming through our Motherhood.
My prayer is that the women who lay eyes on the For the Moms Series, will be encouraged, emboldened, and all the more hopeful.
For the Moms,